The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
When are your genitals available?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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