Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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