i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize