You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
