just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
