i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
