the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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