I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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