I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
he quoted the bible to break up with me
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
