can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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