i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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