k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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