I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
