Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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