Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize
