Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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