all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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