I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize