Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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