Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
