I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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