that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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