Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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