I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
