Having a random hookup so left but love u
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
