SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
