You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
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