No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
