can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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