As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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