Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Randomize
