i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize