THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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