We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
