I want to stick my p in your. b.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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