I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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