you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
