no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
