Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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