You don't have asthma, your pregnant
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
