All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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