as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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