so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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