Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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