What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
