yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
