I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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