I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
