ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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