And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
